You and your spouse or significant other have decided you are going to part ways. You do not want your unhappy relationship to affect your children’s life. You are cordial with each other and do not wish to spend thousands of dollars in attorney’s fees. You decide to come up with your own informal agreement – the children will spend most of the time with you, and your “ex” will have them every other weekend and maybe once or twice a week. You will share expenses and your spouse or significant other agrees to give you $500 a month in child support.
This informal and casual arrangement works for a while until you have a major disagreement about whether the children will be involved in any given activity. Or you find another person you can see developing a long-term relationship with, but your “ex” does not approve. Or your “ex” wants to move across the state and have the children for the entire spring, summer, and winter breaks. Or you realize your “ex” has not been paying the proper share of child support… the list goes on and on and on.
You do not have an official parenting plan signed by both parties and approved by the court. In other words, you do not have the legal contract that will protect you in court. Now, the legal battles start, and you will end up spending thousands of dollars in attorney’s fees. Worse, this informal agreement that seemed to work “fine” is no longer “fine” and your children will likely have to deal with new changes in their life after having gotten used to their new life with their separated parents.
Having a parenting plan during a divorce or separation is crucial because it establishes clear guidelines for coparenting responsibilities, schedule and decision making regarding the children. It helps reduce conflict, provides stability for the children, and ensures both parents are involved in their upbringing. Additionally, it is a reference point and legal contract in case of disputes or changes in circumstances.
You can have a Mediated Settlement Agreement, that includes a parenting plan, without having to go through the arduous emotional and financial expense of litigation with what is known as Pre-Suit Mediation.
Once the Mediated Settlement Agreement is signed by the parties, it is filed with the court and it becomes a binding legal contract that will protect you and your children in the future.
